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Fun fact: the English language invented swear words. For real! Back in 1066(ish) a French (Norman) guy by the name of Duke William of Normandy thought he should be the next king of England rather than the one the English picked. So he invaded, and for the next couple centuries, the English aristocracy also held French landed titles. During this time, the English language was mostly German. It only had a few hundred words, and very few synonyms. Back then, there was only word for shit, and that was shit (actually shitten). If you took a Brit Lit class and had to suffer Canterbury Tales, then this is the type of English we are talking about. (Sorry Chaucer, your irony is dead thanks to Allanis, but your profanity lives on) Before 1066, there was offensive language, but it took effort and creativity! Calling someone’s mother a highly productive sex worker has always been considered rude. Insults required finesse and intention, then the French came. 

Once the English and French nobility started overlapping, they became offended by the use of such a primitive language such as English in their presence. The French language descended from Latin, a much older, more worldly language. Latin had been evolving for over a millennia of imperial conquest (don’t worry, English speakers, our language will get the benefits of centuries of colonization too!). The French considered English to be a “vulgar” language. Vulgar’s original meaning was “of the common people.” “Common people” was a thinly veiled code phrase for “poor people.” So once the French took over, it magically became offensive to speak like a poor person.

Would Jesus be offended if I spoke like a poor person? Fuck no. 

At the Pentecost, the Holy Spirit came down and gave the Disciples the ability to speak in a way that all who heard them understood what they were saying. The Church (capital “C” Church means all churches rather than little “c” church which means a local congregation) had decided that we don’t really want that gift any more. Sure, you will find a Christian Church liturgy, Bible, and Bible commentary in every language living or dead, but the Church will always frown on “vulgar” language. Declaring some forms of speaking right and just while others inappropriate for divine discussion creates the exact sort of in group/out group dynamic that Jesus came to get rid of. Jesus cruised around with fishermen, sailors, and sex workers, all professions renown for their vulgar form of speech whether it be English or Aramaic. He brought people to the first century equivalent of church gatherings, and the Bible makes no mention of Jesus performing the miracle of getting all of his rag tag bunch to use proper language.  Some people use harsher speech. Some people are turned off by high church talk. Some of those people still want to know more about the Bible and develop a stronger relationship to Christ. This website is my attempt to reclaim the Spiritual gift of Speaking in Tongues, but rather than Pentecostal gibberish, it’s swear words and pop culture references. 

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